Life can offer us many challenges having to do with loss. When we are faced with relationship loss, financial loss, loss of health, loss of limb, loss of regard, or loss of love, we can feel overwhelmingly anxious, depressed and stressed. When the anxiety, depression and stress get too big, we may have a nervous breakdown ? that is, we become incapable of functioning in our everyday life and incapable of coping with our daily challenges.
What causes one person to have a nervous breakdown while another, with equally difficult or even more difficult challenges, is able to stay functioning and even optimistic?
Imagine a seven year old child trying to cope with a big loss in his or her life, like the loss of a parent. What enables the seven year old to handle this loss? A seven year old can handle the loss only when there is a loving adult helping him or her with the loss. When there is no loving adult helping with the loss, the child may handle the loss by shutting down. The shutting down may lead to a loss of functioning, such as doing poorly in school.
However, when the child does not feel alone with the loss ? when there is love sustaining the child from an adult source ? this child will be able to cope with the feelings of loss. The same is true for us as adults. We all have a very hard time with loss when we feel alone with it, but we can manage it when we are not alone.
However, we cannot always rely on others to be here for us in times of loss, stress and overwhelm. Those people who have family and friends to always turn to for emotional and financial support during times of loss are fortunate indeed. But there are many people who are not so fortunate. Without others to turn to, we need to be able to turn to a reliable inner source of love to make it through and not feel alone. This reliable source needs to be our own inner spiritually connected loving Adult self. Those people who are able to manage loss without losing functioning are those people who do not feel alone inside because they have developed a strong loving Adult self.
I define the loving Adult as the part of us that is open to learning from and connected with a spiritual source of love, wisdom and guidance. It is the part of us that takes loving action in our own behalf, nurtures us when we feel fear and grief, and operates from the truth from Spirit rather than from the lies of our wounded self ? our ego. Just as children can manage loss when there is a loving adult to help them, the child in us can manage loss when we have a strong, spiritually connected loving Adult self to help us. As a loving Adult we know we are never alone. We know we are always being loved, sustained and guided by a spiritual Source.
It is often not enough to have a strong religious or spiritual connection. If you have not been using that connection to develop your loving Adult self, then there is no part of you to bring love and comfort to yourself when you most need it, and no part of you that can take loving action for yourself, especially when things are overwhelming.
People who have nervous breakdowns are people who are not operating from a loving Adult in their everyday lives. They are able to function as long as things go well, but when things fall apart, as they often do in life, these people may also fall apart. Without a loving Adult to bring the love and truth of Spirit to them, they end up feeling too alone to manage loss.
The Inner Bonding process we teach is a very powerful process for developing a strong loving Adult self. When Inner Bonding is practiced consistently, the loving Adult naturally develops. We all can develop enough personal power and a deep enough spiritual connection to sustain us during the difficult times. We don't have to be at the mercy of life's challenges. Practicing the 6 Steps of Inner Bonding is like putting money in the bank for when it might be needed. The more you practice the process and develop the loving Adult, the easier it is to handle life's big challenges as they arise.
About The Author
Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is the best-selling author and co-author of eight books, including "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By You?" She is the co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding healing process. Learn Inner Bonding now! Visit her web site for a FREE Inner Bonding course: http://www.innerbonding.com or http://www.innerbonding.com. Phone sessions available.
eco-friendly cleaning service Bannockburn ..If there was a way of relaxing quickly and easily... Read More
We all know what it feels like to have our... Read More
Governements and businesses have regularly highlighted the costs of stress... Read More
One of the dumbest things I have ever done is... Read More
Do you feel stress at work? Do you carry your... Read More
The predominant role human conditioning plays in a stressful environment.... Read More
Get at least 15 minutes of sunshine daily.Daily Exercise -... Read More
"We do not stop playing because we grow old. We... Read More
Let's face it. If you are stressed, agitated and flitting... Read More
Is your in-tray or inbox full? I don't normally check... Read More
What do you think of when you see that word?... Read More
On a beautiful summer day years ago, I went water... Read More
Most of us are trying to balance work, home, and... Read More
Caring for a chronically ill loved one can be one... Read More
An excellent stress reducer can be something as simple as... Read More
"Adopting the right attitude can convert a negative stress into... Read More
Today's workplace produces plenty of stress. Life's little hassles mount... Read More
First, let's make a distinction between pressure and stress. We... Read More
No this is not related to praying, this is how... Read More
Matthew 11:28 Come unto me, all ye that labour... Read More
Author and speaker H. Stephen Glenn has said,"In terms of... Read More
The right amount of stress can be good for you,... Read More
As we celebrate yet another Labor Day, I thought it... Read More
Let's face it! The majority of our time is either... Read More
1. The Law of StagnationThis is also known as first... Read More
cleaning lady near Lincolnshire ..Loneliness and separation are the real illness of our times.... Read More
This anger management Practice draws on the dual wisdom of... Read More
Do you have stress in your life?......I know you answered... Read More
Did you know that taking a short trip, such as... Read More
The right amount of stress can be good for you,... Read More
The National Center for health statistics reported that in 1997,... Read More
Fear, and its accompanying seriousness, causes our suffering. Fear restricts... Read More
Have you ever noticed how we keep falling into the... Read More
Let's face it. If you are stressed, agitated and flitting... Read More
1. Acknowledge that requesting support, guidance and partnership is not... Read More
Tough leaders are usually seen as ogres. Their exacting demands... Read More
Do you feel that you just don't have the time... Read More
Here's an amazing quote from Time magazine:"At birth a baby's... Read More
Stress and anxiety can prematurely age our mind and body.... Read More
WHAT THE RESEARCH SAYSExperts in the stress management field have... Read More
Statistics show that all of us experience stress at one... Read More
No this is not related to praying, this is how... Read More
Why are you so busy? Do you really have too... Read More
There are times in every person's life when things do... Read More
Managing stress is not easy if you don't have the... Read More
One of the hardest forms of stress to avoid is... Read More
Traffic jams. Toddler tantrums. Deadlines at work. Money troubles. Too... Read More
Whether we are at work, traveling, or at home, we've... Read More
Syndicated columnist Dale Dauten recently wrote, "One of life's great... Read More
Rhodiola Rosea is the latest natural remedy to join the... Read More
Stress Management |