Mark Twain once said, "It's not what we don't know that hurts us. It's what we know that isn't so."
At this point, you might be saying, "Wait a minute, if I believe I know something, doesn't that make it so?"
Well, yes and no. (That's a classic therapist answer, by the way.) The yes part is that in many ways, if we believe something, that can make it so for us. Henry Ford said, "Whether you believe you can or you believe you can't, you're right."
The no part is this - what if what you believe isn't accurate, is no longer true, or just isn't so?
I realize this might be a lot to think about with your morning coffee, but consider this - a belief is merely a feeling of certainty about something. Some beliefs enhance and expand our lives, such as "if it's possible in the world, it's possible for me."Other beliefs tend to limit and inhibit our lives. It's been my experience that we carry around many more limiting beliefs than we do enhancing beliefs.
Most, if not all, of our limiting beliefs can be divided into three categories; I am......, people are......., and the world is......."
I am.........People are..........
These limiting beliefs include our prejudices and influence how we see other people. Some of the most common are -
That's a man's/woman's job
Any kind of prejudice
People can't be trusted
Everyone is out for themselves
Nice guys finish last
People are too busy to care
The World Is..........
These limiting beliefs influence how we see the world and our position in it. Some of the most common are -
It's a dog-eat-dog world.
The world is a ghetto (oops, that's George Benson, just to jazz things up a little)
Society owes me a living.
The world is falling apart.
Do you recognize yourself in any of these limiting beliefs? Can you think of other beliefs that have limited you in the past or are limiting you now?
My purpose here is twofold. First, to get you to identify and begin to consider how certain beliefs have limited you. Second, to give you some tools for changing limiting beliefs into beliefs that can support and enhance your life.
Have you ever noticed that when you buy something new, such as a car, you begin to see that car everywhere? They were there before, it's just that now your focus has changed. It's the same way with limiting beliefs. They point our focus in a certain direction, and we can always find evidence to support them.
But other than getting to be "right", what good does it do? Our limiting beliefs continue to hold us back.
Here are three ways that you can begin to change limiting beliefs-
1) Begin to question them. Ask yourself, "Is this really true?" Would a camera, taking a picture, be able to support this belief?
2) Counter the belief. Sometimes, just saying and considering the opposite is enough to change the belief. For example, change "I'm too old" into "I'm just the right age to do what I want to do."
3) Redirect your brain. For example, ask yourself "In how many ways can I be happy now, have people care about me, has the world worked?" All of these are counters to the limiting beliefs listed above.
Our beliefs can either limit or enhance our lives. With the proper tools, the choice is then up to us. What will it be for you?
Visit secretsofgreatrelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.
expert residential cleaners Park Ridge ...So, you've recognised that you are suffering from stress and... Read More
Understanding StressStress has been called "the invisible disease". It is... Read More
A grandfather, whose grandson came to him angry at a... Read More
Stress Vs PressureStress is something we all have, it's not... Read More
Everywhere I go, I hear the same unpleasant sentence repeated... Read More
Many of my readers write to me about the tensions... Read More
The moment I read the story I'm about to share... Read More
Positive self-esteem is very important for our general health and... Read More
With almost 50% of workers complaining that their jobs are... Read More
What do you think of when you see that word?... Read More
Do you attack problems and solve them or do you... Read More
One of the ways I have avoided a lot of... Read More
Every day we are faced with a situation where our... Read More
26 ways to minimize and manage the unhealthy effects of... Read More
Learn to have healthy relationships:This subject could fill an entire... Read More
Stressed? Relax Right Now with 5 Super-Simple Stress-BustersStressed-out? Don't know... Read More
Is your in-tray or inbox full? I don't normally check... Read More
"Watch your language."We all heard this admonition as kids and... Read More
"We do not stop playing because we grow old. We... Read More
Most humans experience unexpected setbacks which can cause huge stress... Read More
Q. Help! I moved from the Dallas to Denver. I... Read More
Conceptualizing stress: Stress often has a negative connotation. Failure, illnesses,... Read More
Everyone experiences stress at some point in their life. In... Read More
What is the greatest fear of man? Is it death?... Read More
Panic.Heart racing. Palms sweating. Breathing rapid and shallow. Mouth dry.... Read More
interior house cleaning Winnetka ...My son was watching a Richard Scarry video this morning... Read More
The fall season signals a shift in most people's minds.... Read More
Health Impacts of StressStress is a funny concept, try to... Read More
The Rule of BalanceThere is more to life than work.... Read More
1)Excessive worryNo, I'm not saying "don't worry, be happy."Well-used worry... Read More
We wonder how many of you might recognise this scenario?... Read More
June is the month of the honey moon. Custom holds... Read More
1. The Law of GiftsRichard Bach, author of "Illusions" says... Read More
1. The Law of StagnationThis is also known as first... Read More
On a beautiful summer day years ago, I went water... Read More
Stress, America's #1 health problem, is a leading cause of... Read More
Do you feel tense and anxious at work? Do your... Read More
Learning methods of stress elimination is a vital skill in... Read More
Do you ever fret? In today's materialistic age, sometimes fretting... Read More
The pace of life seems to quicken every year. More... Read More
"I've got too much to do, I've just got too... Read More
We are not designed for long term stress.It causes us... Read More
With almost 50% of workers complaining that their jobs are... Read More
We are currently living in a capitalist society where money... Read More
Are you looking for stress relief? No drugs, no meditation?... Read More
To combat modern day stressors, you need to realize that... Read More
In a hectic world, it's all too easy to reach... Read More
Have you ever noticed what occurs when you are suddenly... Read More
Loneliness and separation are the real illness of our times.... Read More
Meditation, relaxation and visualisation are the standard recommendations for reducing... Read More
Stress Management |