Nicole Kidman and Will Ferrell recently starred in the movie version of the 1960s TV sitcom "Bewitched." For those of you who missed the movie or are too young to remember the TV show, here is the basic plot:
Samantha Stevens is the wife who looks like a regular woman, but is in fact a nice witch, able to wiggle her nose and create any object, situation, or person she desires. Darren Stevens is a somewhat nerdy architect who tries to get his wife to not use her abilities and act normal. Mayhem and laughter ensue.
As a little kid back in the late 60s, I wondered what in the world could be wrong with Darren.
Here was a guy who could have anything he ever wanted because of the gifts of his wife, and all he could do was try to get her not to use her gifts and "be normal."
Even as a little kid, I knew this guy had to be some special kind of idiot.
The entire situation reminds me of one of my favorite quotes about marriage:
"When you marry, you don't marry one person, you marry three. The person you think they are, the person they really are, and the person they will become as a result of marrying you."
One of the purposes of marriage is to help the other person grow into the best possible version of themselves.
Yet I believe we all too often do just the opposite and act just like Darren Stevens.
How to be a Darren
In a word, lousy. This is a great way to create distance in a relationship. You will also prevent your relationship from reaching it's full potential. If you have kids, it's a horrible model for how to treat someone you supposedly love and an equally horrible model for how to do relationships and marriage.
You have been a very poor influence on your partner. At best, you have a very fertile breeding ground for resentment. At worst, you have a breakup looking for a place to happen.
How to do much better than Darren
Become a student of your partner. Make it your assignment to know this one person very well.
Then use your database. Most couples who have been together for any length of time actually know each other quite well if they stop to thing about it. Most couples just don't use what they know in a positive way.
Celebrate the gifts of your partner. Encourage them in their gifts. Support them in discovering and exploring their gifts and skills.
Take advantage of the information available today about how to do relationships. Visit www.secretsofgreatrelationships.com for tips.
Brag about your partner to others.
Tell your partner, often and in detail, what you admire in them.
Results
A great place to come home to. A great model for your children, and to others, about how to do marriage and relationships. Richard Bach, in his book "The Bridge Across Forever" talks of a kind of relationship in which you are better off and stronger together than you would be alone. When you support and lift up your partner, you are creating a relationship where you are stronger together than either of you would be alone.
In which situation would you prefer to live?
Visit secretsofgreatrelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.
scheduled maid service Northbrook ..Animal spirit totems can be viewed in different ways according... Read More
I have, in my opinion, the world's perfect job. Just... Read More
One does not have to live long to realize that... Read More
Have you ever thought about how your orientation to time... Read More
Enlightenment can come in an instant or it may take... Read More
We know that David did much to stabilize the Kingdom... Read More
In the early 90's I had a spontaneous Kundalini Awakening... Read More
Enlightenment, which is as varied as each individual's fingerprint, is... Read More
Nicole Kidman and Will Ferrell recently starred in the movie... Read More
I can see the cops coming! They're a good thousand... Read More
Lonely Song"a box of paints - lament for my da"It... Read More
(Channeled)Roy-when does the end of physical life come? Is it... Read More
If you would like to learn to read tarot cards,... Read More
Recently I was watching a re-run of "Everybody Loves Raymond".... Read More
The greatest frustration in a Christian's life is not being... Read More
This question, "what is grace" plagued me more into knowing... Read More
One of the first issues people on the spiritual path... Read More
What is success? It probably means different things to different... Read More
Some people think just by saying the words thank you... Read More
All Shamans have several power songs because the vibration of... Read More
The world's idea of justice and freedom fall short of... Read More
Count yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in... Read More
Worldwide extensive research is being published related to the mind-body... Read More
The practice of meditating on loving-kindness may be over two... Read More
People have always sought the sacred. It is the Divine... Read More
reliable maid service Highland Park ..The Planetary Spread is an excellent layout to use when... Read More
In the interest of mankind the Angels are delivering messages... Read More
All Shamans have several power songs because the vibration of... Read More
Recently, I received a postcard from Ireland. Without reading the... Read More
Did we just overlook the amount of love that God... Read More
At the start of your dream journey, one of the... Read More
Fanny J. Crosby's famous hymn, "Tell Me the Story of... Read More
If you would like to learn to read tarot cards,... Read More
God !"My son will be brought up in a place... Read More
Sometimes, in traveling a path, we discover a short-cut, and... Read More
He knew it was going to happen. He wasn't really... Read More
"We're one, but we are not the same."-Bono, U2Once I... Read More
During moments of helplessness, there is always one thing that... Read More
In Corrogue, Celtic mythology helps me live a wonderful life.As... Read More
All of my life I had heard, read and sang... Read More
With another year full of family events coming upon us,... Read More
The magic of the tarot was obvious to me the... Read More
Originating in what is now modern India; Tantra is at... Read More
Christianity: White man's religion?Martin Luther King referred to Sunday as... Read More
We are living in highly challenged times. Our mass consciousness... Read More
Recently, I received a frantic midnight call from one of... Read More
In his book, Stress Without Distress, Dr. Selye suggests that... Read More
We have a proclivity to think of individuals and nations... Read More
Unless God has changed the way he does things it... Read More
Back in the days of the old law of Moses,... Read More
Spirituality |