Home
>
Stress Management
>
Calming The Voice of Stress

Calming The Voice of Stress

But how can this happen to someone?

Let's concentrate on how these illnesses affect the way we value the self. Of all of the destructive patterns of behavior these illnesses cause, the way a sufferer talks to the self is the fuel that maintains their illness.

I have experienced depression from two sides. For 5 years, a series of traumatic events triggered a personal nightmare I believed would never end. One of these events came when my lover was diagnosed with depression. At this time, I too had entered into the spiral of anxiety-induced depression. Both of these experiences have given me an insight into how sufferers destroy any value of the self.

Let me give a couple of examples. With my partner, if I'd arranged an evening out with friends, she'd say:

"No, I won't come, you go without me. I never have anything interesting to say. I just bore people. They'll find me an effort to be with. I'll stay here."

If I made a mistake, I'd say to myself:

"I'm useless. I'm no good at anything. Everything I do I get wrong."

This self-deprecation then spreads into other areas of life. You begin to criticize the way you look, the decisions you make or don't make, and you focus solely on the downside of life. Each time a little bit of self-worth, a little bit of self-respect and a little bit of self-confidence are eroded. Eventually, they are lost completely. When I reached my lowest point, having lost everything and everyone I loved, I'd say to myself:

"If I died tomorrow, no one would know and no one would care."

So, what helped me to come out of the fog?

Well, the reason I thought I'd become depressed was because of a series of traumatic events occurring at the same time. I was wrong. The root cause of my depression lay in the ways I reacted to them. One of the ways I'd reacted was to blame myself for events I couldn't control. The more I blamed myself, the more I beat myself up. The more I beat myself up, the more my self-esteem decreased.

The phrases I have used to briefly illustrate self-deprecating phrases we continually use against the self are mild. I'm sure you realize that many people use much stronger phrases than I've given here. The point is that these phrases would be totally unacceptable to say to others. You wouldn't tell a person that they were boring, an effort to be with and that everyone found their company dull and it would be better for everyone else if they kept away from people.

Agreed?

Yet, if I say to people:

"Pay yourself compliments. Accentuate your good in all areas of your life. Write down your good points, your triumphs, your achievements. Remind yourself as often as possible about all the good you have done."

They look at me like I'm an alien and say they'd feel stupid. Or uncomfortable. Or even embarrassed.

Yet they don't feel any of these emotions when they talk to themselves using emotionally charged, self-deprecating phrases! And like rust upon metal, these phrases gradually erode our self-esteem and our confidence.

OK, here's the bottom-line. I'd like you to inscribe what you are about to read into your mind over and over again until it is permanently etched there:

It is NEVER acceptable to talk to myself in a way I know is inappropriate and even offensive if I spoke in the same way to others.

Time for me to sign off, but before I do, here's a phrase I say to myself every single day without fail. Please use it, it is very powerful:

"If you put yourself down, down is where you will stay."

Chris Green is the author of the new book "Conquering Stress", a special program which will show you how to conquer stressful illnesses such as depression, anxiety, panic and worry permanently and without taking powerful drugs. You can learn more about this new book and purchase it at http://www.conqueringstress.com

insured cleaning company Deerfield ..

In The News:

Chrome now autofills passport and driver's license info automatically. Google's latest browser update adds official document support with encryption and user control.

Scammers impersonate Department of Veterans Affairs employees claiming veterans owe money, but real VA communications only direct to VA.gov or official channels.

The AltoVolo Sigma hybrid-electric aircraft flies 500 miles at 220 mph while operating 80% quieter than helicopters, featuring safety systems and compact design.

Google search scam alert: fake customer service numbers can give scammers remote control of your phone. Learn how to spot these traps and protect yourself.

Electric vehicles overtake gas cars in total CO2 savings after just two years of driving, with emissions benefits growing over time as power grids get cleaner.

Louvre Museum reportedly used "Louvre" as password for surveillance system during $100M jewel heist. Learn how weak passwords put even famous institutions at risk.

Bipartisan AI jobs bill from Sens. Hawley and Warner would require companies to report AI-related layoffs and hiring to Department of Labor quarterly.

Joe A. from Shelton, Connecticut, lost $228,000 to a ZAP Solutions cryptocurrency investment scam after his divorce, highlighting rising online fraud.

AI-powered autonomous trucks from Waabi and Volvo target U.S. freight driver shortage with Level 4 self-driving technology and NVIDIA computing platform integration.

Survive flight disruptions with expert travel tips: Book early morning flights, download airline apps and know your refund rights during service cuts.

Apple's iOS 26.1 update delivers major security fixes, performance boosts and enhanced privacy controls for your iPhone. Discover why updating now protects your data.

Russian hackers use fake CAPTCHA tests to spread dangerous malware targeting governments and journalists. Learn how to protect yourself from these deceptive attacks.

Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.

Miami-Dade debuts America's first autonomous police SUV with AI cameras, drone deployment and real-time crime detection in groundbreaking law enforcement pilot.

Bank impostor scams cost Americans $2.9 billion as criminals use AI voices and caller ID spoofing to steal life savings. Learn nine essential fraud protection tips.

Foreign-owned apps secretly harvest personal data from seniors, making them prime targets for scams. Learn how to protect your privacy and stop data brokers today.

Sens. Josh Hawley and Richard Blumenthal introduce bipartisan GUARD Act to protect minors from AI chatbots through mandatory age verification and disclosure requirements.

Ghost-tapping scammers exploit wireless technology to drain accounts through small transactions, but RFID-blocking wallets and transaction alerts can protect you.

French pilot project demonstrates wireless charging roads that can deliver over 300 kilowatts of power to EVs while driving, potentially eliminating range anxiety.

YouTube's Ghost Network spreads information-stealing malware through thousands of fake videos offering cracked software, using compromised accounts and fake engagement.

Protect your privacy by disabling your smart TV microphone. Most TVs have hidden mics that listen even when voice commands are off. Learn quick steps to stop unwanted audio capture.

SessionReaper vulnerability hits Magento and Adobe Commerce stores, compromising 250+ sites in one day. Hackers steal data and hijack shopping sessions.

Master essential parental controls and digital safety tools to protect your kids online. Learn screen time limits, location settings and privacy controls every parent needs.

Cybersecurity expert shares six essential steps to protect against dark web threats, including data removal services, password managers and antivirus software.

NVIDIA GPU space mission could revolutionize cloud services by enabling orbital data centers that make apps, games and AI tools faster and more efficient.

Calming The Voice of Stress

Stress Management