Home
>
Writing
>
Dig Deeper to Reveal Character

Dig Deeper to Reveal Character

He ran up the steps and knocked on the door. After a few moments, it was opened by a woman with dark curly hair and a strained expression. What you've just read are two simple sentences showing a common situation. So common that the author very probably has not given a thought as to whether her words reflect what really happened.

She wants her character to pay a visit to someone; she wants him to knock on the door; she wants someone to open the door. So that's what she writes.

Sometimes, this is exactly what you need - a fast, simple transition to get you from one scene to the next. But sometimes, by not thinking about what other options you have to show the scene, you lose an opportunity to slip in some revealing information about your characters. Before you go on auto-pilot and write down a few clich?d lines, stop and think. Ask yourself:

What do I want the reader to know about these people?
How can I use this action to reveal aspects of character?

To develop the scenario we started with: consider how people reveal character by

the way they approach a house and a front door;

the way they respond to a knock;

the activities they're engaged in when the knock sounds and

how they react to other people in the scene. What could your character do besides 'run up the steps'? He could pause and try to regain control over his emotions. He could trudge wearily up the path. He could pick his way over a child's toys or around a rusting car up on bricks.

Did he knock on the door or did he press a bell push? Did the bell fail to work? Did the visitor find the door closed or was the main door open, with only a screen door between him and the inhabitant? Did the person inside respond to the first knock or ring? Or did the visitor actually have to go around to the back of the house, to see if someone was outside in the garden? (Was it a garden - or just an area of cracked earth with a few weeds struggling through?)

Whether we're at the front door or back door - how did the person inside the house respond? Did they come to the door immediately, or yell "Be there in a minute!" Did they call out "Come in, Mary" - obviously expecting someone else? Did the visitor hear sounds of confidently approaching footsteps... or the shuffle of slippers?

Let's try the original few sentences again. Still out on the street, Luke looked at the house. Would she remember him? And if she did - would he be welcome? It didn't seem likely, given the way she'd screamed at him when they parted. But people changed.

He took a deep breath and walked quickly down the sloping path to the front door. A carton of milk sat on the step, with a bill tucked underneath it. He bent down and felt the carton. It was warm. Kelly hadn't been outside her front door today, then. Had they got to her already? Anxiety knifing through him, he rapped sharply on the glass panel in the door. By describing Luke's actions in a way that is in keeping with his emotions, we are telling the reader a lot more - before we get to anyone actually opening the door. (We don't even know if someone is going to open it... we are beginning to fear for Kelly, because of the way Luke interprets what he sees.)

Make this a rule: when writing or polishing your work, always ask the question: "Does what I've written reflect what really happened? Or can I dig deeper and tell the reader a whole lot more?" (c) copyright Marg McAlister

Marg McAlister has published magazine articles, short stories, books for children, ezines, promotional material, sales letters and web content. She has written 5 distance education courses on writing, and her online help for writers is popular all over the world. Sign up for her regular writers' tipsheet at http://www.writing4success.com/

one time home cleaning Highland Park ..

In The News:

Privacy risks are hiding in plain sight, as your personal data is likely being collected, tracked, and sold without your knowledge.

VenHub, a fully autonomous, AI-powered smart store just opened at the LAX/Metro Transit Center in Los Angeles.

A woman's Facebook account takeover reveals dangerous social engineering tactics and provides lessons on recovery, avoiding scams and enacting stronger security measures.

Shanghai engineers are using 432 walking robots to relocate a complex, preserving Shikumen architecture while creating space for a modern underground hub and cultural center.

Major healthcare data analytics firm Episource had a cybersecurity incident exposing 5 million patients' medical records and personal information in recent breach.

A new sophisticated PayPal scam sends legitimate-looking emails from official PayPal addresses, using phone numbers instead of links to convince victims to download remote access tools.

Fox News' AI Newsletter brings you the latest on this rapidly evolving technology.

The innovative Kara Pod device extracts moisture from air to create mineral-rich water and brew coffee, featuring UV sterilization and compatibility with Nespresso pods.

Gov. Hochul unveiled New York's nuclear power plant project to power a million homes, which faces permit challenges while promising jobs and a cleaner energy future.

SAFE introduces Aerie, an underground luxury bunker combining high-end living with advanced security, wellness amenities and interactive walls simulating panoramic views.

A Facebook scammer posing as Elon Musk tricked a victim with promises of a Tesla and $250,000, requesting gift cards that become untraceable once the codes are shared.

Experience hands-free golfing with the Robera Neo smart caddie that uses AI to follow you, navigate obstacles and carry your clubs with GPS course mapping.

Cybersecurity alert: 16 billion passwords exposed in massive credential database affecting major platforms. Protect your accounts with password managers

The innovative BeBot robot uses electric power to remove pollution from shorelines, covering 20-30 times more area than manual collection while preserving wildlife.

A new ClickFix campaign targets macOS users with fake Spectrum support sites, tricking victims with CAPTCHA failures to paste commands that install information-stealing malware.

AI-powered autonomous trucks from Plus Automation are being tested across the U.S., Europe and Asia to solve logistics challenges while facing regulatory hurdles and labor concerns.

Your health information might feel private and secure with your doctor, but the reality is far more complicated. Data brokers collect a wide range of sensitive health data, from diagnoses and prescription details to personal identifiers, and sell this data to marketers, insurers, and other third parties.

Kepler Robotics has officially introduced its Forerunner K2 "Bumblebee" humanoid robot at the SAIC-GM automotive plant in Shanghai, marking a significant moment in the real-world deployment of advanced robotics.

Scammers never seem to be running out of new ways to try and get their hands on your money – and lately, they've been getting sophisticated.

Thirty people were injured and killed, though the exact number remains currently unknown, when a suicide bomber blew himself up in a Damascus church.

Unexpected password reset alerts signal potential hacking attempts or phishing scams. Learn how to respond and establish stronger security measures for your accounts.

A historic electric airplane flight landed at JFK with passengers, marking a milestone as Beta Technologies demonstrates the practicality and efficiency of electric air travel.

The Chaos ransomware group breached Optima Tax Relief in a double-extortion attack, stealing sensitive customer case files and corporate documents with personal information.

Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.

The first human brain-computer interface by Paradromics was completed in 20 minutes, featuring microelectrodes to help paralyzed individuals control computers with thoughts.

Dig Deeper to Reveal Character

Writing