Home
>
Writing
>
Dig Deeper to Reveal Character

Dig Deeper to Reveal Character

He ran up the steps and knocked on the door. After a few moments, it was opened by a woman with dark curly hair and a strained expression. What you've just read are two simple sentences showing a common situation. So common that the author very probably has not given a thought as to whether her words reflect what really happened.

She wants her character to pay a visit to someone; she wants him to knock on the door; she wants someone to open the door. So that's what she writes.

Sometimes, this is exactly what you need - a fast, simple transition to get you from one scene to the next. But sometimes, by not thinking about what other options you have to show the scene, you lose an opportunity to slip in some revealing information about your characters. Before you go on auto-pilot and write down a few clich?d lines, stop and think. Ask yourself:

What do I want the reader to know about these people?
How can I use this action to reveal aspects of character?

To develop the scenario we started with: consider how people reveal character by

the way they approach a house and a front door;

the way they respond to a knock;

the activities they're engaged in when the knock sounds and

how they react to other people in the scene. What could your character do besides 'run up the steps'? He could pause and try to regain control over his emotions. He could trudge wearily up the path. He could pick his way over a child's toys or around a rusting car up on bricks.

Did he knock on the door or did he press a bell push? Did the bell fail to work? Did the visitor find the door closed or was the main door open, with only a screen door between him and the inhabitant? Did the person inside respond to the first knock or ring? Or did the visitor actually have to go around to the back of the house, to see if someone was outside in the garden? (Was it a garden - or just an area of cracked earth with a few weeds struggling through?)

Whether we're at the front door or back door - how did the person inside the house respond? Did they come to the door immediately, or yell "Be there in a minute!" Did they call out "Come in, Mary" - obviously expecting someone else? Did the visitor hear sounds of confidently approaching footsteps... or the shuffle of slippers?

Let's try the original few sentences again. Still out on the street, Luke looked at the house. Would she remember him? And if she did - would he be welcome? It didn't seem likely, given the way she'd screamed at him when they parted. But people changed.

He took a deep breath and walked quickly down the sloping path to the front door. A carton of milk sat on the step, with a bill tucked underneath it. He bent down and felt the carton. It was warm. Kelly hadn't been outside her front door today, then. Had they got to her already? Anxiety knifing through him, he rapped sharply on the glass panel in the door. By describing Luke's actions in a way that is in keeping with his emotions, we are telling the reader a lot more - before we get to anyone actually opening the door. (We don't even know if someone is going to open it... we are beginning to fear for Kelly, because of the way Luke interprets what he sees.)

Make this a rule: when writing or polishing your work, always ask the question: "Does what I've written reflect what really happened? Or can I dig deeper and tell the reader a whole lot more?" (c) copyright Marg McAlister

Marg McAlister has published magazine articles, short stories, books for children, ezines, promotional material, sales letters and web content. She has written 5 distance education courses on writing, and her online help for writers is popular all over the world. Sign up for her regular writers' tipsheet at http://www.writing4success.com/

shuttle to Midway Beardstown .. Lockport Chicago limo O’Hare

In The News:

The FBI has issued a warning that scammers are impersonating doctors, police and banks using spoofed numbers as "smishing" texts surge nationwide.

Communities with unreliable internet service stand to gain after Amazon's Project Kuiper launched its first full batch of satellites into orbit April 28.

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson says unsubscribing from spam might actually backfire. Learn when to avoid it and stop junk effectively.

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson talks about how the first nonstop beating heart transplant, called zero ischemic time, at Taiwan hospital changes surgery.

Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson: FBI warns of "time-traveling" hackers.

Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson talks about a soft, vine-like robot called SPROUT that aids safe survivor rescues in collapsed buildings.

Health insurance giant Blue Shield of California confirmed it had been sharing private health data of 4.7 million users with Google for three years without even realizing it.

Delta and JetZero’s blended wing body aircraft marks a meaningful step toward a cleaner, quieter and more efficient future for air travel.

Recent reports show many common passwords can be cracked in literally seconds. Kurt the CyberGuy explains how to strengthen your passwords.

Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.

Iron, a robot that stands 5 feet, 8 inches tall and weighs 154 pounds, combines advanced artificial intelligence with human-like movement and exceptional vision.

Hertz, the rental car giant, recently confirmed that customer information was exposed through a cyberattack on one of its software vendors.

There are a number of features with AirPods you may or may not know about to take your listening experience to the next level. Kurt the CyberGuy explains.

These 35 Chrome extensions have privacy and security concerns. Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson says to delete them now.

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson says 329,000 mph fusion rocket promises to be fast, disruptive and enable deep-space missions.

Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson says a new autonomous AI is a game changer that also raises privacy risks. Is your data safe?

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson says robots and drones are revolutionizing fruit farming with faster picking and smarter handling.

Landmark Admin revises May 2024 cyberattack scope to show twice as many people were affected. Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson gives tips to help stay safe from an insurance data breach.

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson talks about how Yamaha’s hydrogen outboard motor could revolutionize boating with zero emissions.

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson reveals how to memorialize or remove a deceased loved one’s Facebook account and protect their digital legacy from misuse or scams.

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson says an Apple Watch saved psychiatrist Amanda Faulkner by detecting deadly leukemia early.

Scammers and fraudsters are increasingly targeting the most vulnerable, especially nursing homes and the personal data of their residents. Kurt the CyberGuy has safety tips.

Infected USB flash drives can spread malware among multiple organizations in ways that can easily bypass traditional security systems.

With a fully automated warehouse system and AI-powered robots, Ocado's Hive picks, packs and delivers grocery store orders in just a few minutes.

Dig Deeper to Reveal Character

Writing