Success is a 6 Letter Word

Let me ask you a question? What must happen for you to feel successful? Do you need to be admired by the people that you care most about? Do you need to have financial abundance? And if so how would you know what financial abundance is? 1 million dollars, 2, 100, a billion?

What is success anyway? Think about it for a moment, is success what you really want or is it the emotions the feelings that you connect to being successful? I mean, if you imagine yourself to be a success, how does it feel? Do it, just for a moment, imagine you to be a total success. What do you see, what do you hear and how does it feel.

If you did this little exercise you probably imagined, saw and felt pleasurable things. Did you? I bet you did. Because we wouldn't strive for success if we didn't connect pleasure, massive pleasure, to reaching it. Now, think for a moment that reaching success would not be pleasurable. Would you still try to be successful?

It seems that it is not success we are looking for but the feelings, the emotions, the state we suppose to be in once reached what we consider a success.

In fact, for most people success is nothing more than an emotional state. It is the emotional state where we feel totally awesome, energized, joyous, happy, and alive.

Experience number 1: Success is a means to experience the most pleasurable state we can think of.

Now to the next question, what prevents you from feeling that way? What has to happen before you allow yourself theses emotions? In fact, and I will tell you more about that in another article, we ourselves produce our emotional states. We decide, based on rules, beliefs and values we have, what emotional state we enter at any given time. The trigger might come from the outside but the reaction (that is the state we enter because of that trigger) is totally processed and executed by our brain and body. If this was not the case all humans would react exactly the same way on the same event. But that is obviously not the case. Some watch a comedy and laugh until their stomach hurts, while others switch of the TV set being totally bored. Same external event, different emotional reaction.

The difference is how we process external events. Our brain constantly evaluates the information it gets through our senses. Just to repeat it, we can hear something, view something, feel something, smell or taste something.

In every single moment of our life our brain evaluates this information (and much more) to decide what it means to you. And the decision criteria is always, does that mean pain or pleasure. Every single event is considered by your brain that way.

How do you know not to tap on a hot stove? How does your brain know that this action means pain? Because it happened at some time in your life. We all burned our fingers literally one time. Now that was pain and it was big pain. Big enough to make our brain build a memory for this. Our brain builds a rule that goes like "hot stove equals massive pain!"

Next time our brain encounters a similar situation it doesn't have to test -you do not have to go through that pain again- it simply calls the rule to evaluate the situation instead and therefore prevents us to burn our fingers again. This I like going on auto pilot. You do not evaluate an event anymore you simply apply the rule.

Is this a useful function? You bet it is. Rules help us to focus on things we like to focus on while our auto-pilot (our rules and values) drive us safe through the common roads. Even more rules ensure we avoid what our brain considers painful helping us to stay away from pain.

The issue is that our brain might have memorized rules that are limiting in some way. For example, if you, as a little child, where rejected when you wanted to cuddle with your mom this rejection was not very pleasurable. In fact it was painful. Now if this happened on a consistent basis, your brain might build a rule like "If you get to close to others then they reject you which is painful". Can you see the structure of the rule? It is always the same, if ... then... outcome (pain or pleasure).

Now you have a rule to handle rejection. Dependent how painful that experience was for you your brain might decide to avoid rejection under all circumstances by jut preventing you from starting close relationships with others. After all, if you do not have close relationships, you can't be rejected. Sure you loose a source of tremendous pleasure like feeling loved, accepted and the like but if you connect too much pain to being rejected you will always decide to avoid the pain rather than go for the pleasure. Unless the pleasure is so massive that you are willing to bear the chance of pain.

I try to explain the concept at a basic level but it gets much more complicated than that. As a matter of fact, our brain stacks rules. It does not only evaluate one rule at a time but might stack various rules into a hierarchy of rules to come up with a decision. These hierarchies is what we call belief or values. The difference between a belief and a value is that a belief is a rule that we are pretty sure is right. Though we are open to question it. A value on the other hand is a rule or better a stack of rules we are absolutely certain about. We usually never question a value under normal conditions. Even more we get upset when something or someone questions or act against it. If you want to find out some of your values try the following exercise.

Write down the following sentences:

I am .....

All..... are.....

Now fill in the blanks. For example, I am a procrastinator, I am a caring person, I am beautiful etc. You got the point. Now do it with the other sentence. Like, all people are lazy, all people are greedy, all humans have equal right, all people have the right to happiness and so forth.

Now take the last step. Go through the sentences one by one and ask yourself how you would feel if someone or something would violate that point of view. Say you have a value that says you are a caring person. How would you feel if something would tell you are not? Would you get angry? Maybe real angry? If you find a sentence where a violation would make you real angry and upset, you found a value of yours. Many western people share some values; we call it social values, like the idea that every human being is precious. If someone violates this value, we tend to get angry up to a point where a society starts a war.

Ok, now I know about rules, beliefs and values but what has this to do with success.

The answer is, the more rules and beliefs and values you have that limit you gaining pleasure, the harder it usually is for you to see yourself being successful.

Think about it, what has to happen for you to become a success. Some people come up with a laundry list of things that need to be in place to feel successful. "I need to make 2 million dollars a year", "I need to be totally fit", "I need to be totally admired" and so forth.

These people make it really hard for them to ever feel successful. Especially if they have rules that depend on the action of others like being admired.

On the other extreme there are people that feel successful every day, just because they are still alive, just because being alive means opportunities. They have very less rules for allowing them to win the success game and, sure enough win it all the time.

Somewhere in between are you with your rules and values for success.

Find out your personal rules, write them down and evaluate if they are worth being part of your success rules. If not throw them away. How? There are several ways to do this, but this is another topic.

Let's wrap it up. Success is a means to achieve a totally pleasurable state. We do not want success we want the emotions that success will give us.

Success is what we declare it to be. Every on of us has a definition and a set of rules and values to decide if she is successful.

The more complex and longer the list of rules and values is, the harder it is to feel successful.

Reducing the number of rules and finding conflicting rules is a way to ease the road to success tremendously.

Successful people have power because they are in a positive state that helps them focusing their energy on opportunities rather than rules and perceptions.

This article may published freely only in its whole including all appendices.

(c) 2005 by Norbert Haag Online Business Coach

Norbert Haag is a business consultant, entrepeneur and sought after speaker for more than 20 years. His company - Online Business Coach http://www.onlinebusinesscoach.com - provides information and services for online businesses, small business owners and freelancers.

You can reach Norbert at http://www.onlinebusinesscoach.com.

Alexis limo rentals ..
In The News:

A Google DeepMind team has developed an artificial intelligence system that can play video games like a human and take native language commands from players.
Four of the largest school boards in Ontario, Canada have launched lawsuits against TikTok, Meta, and Snapchat, claiming that they have impacted students' thinking and behavior.
Finalists for the inaugural Women’s Prize for Nonfiction, aimed at addressing the gender imbalance in nonfiction publishing, were unveiled on Wednesday.
Tech guru Kurt "CyberGuy" Knutsson breaks down whether the government is watching citizens and what they can do to protect online privacy.
A benchmarking group for artificial intelligence has released new results evaluating the speed of hardware in running AI applications and responding to users.
Sierra Space’s Dream Chaser spaceplane provides a glimpse into the future of space travel. Traveling to space may become a part of everyday life.
The new European Hyperloop Center in the Netherlands aims bring in a new era of transportation. The center will use a steel tube as a proving ground for testing the new vehicle.
Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.
While it may be incredibly tempting to have a “go with the flow" mindset like the rest of your vacation, your technology definitely should not be compromised while traveling.
Have you ever accidentally deleted an app from your iPhone that you’ve already paid for? Don't worry. We’ve got a trick that will help you get it back without having to buy it again.
Apple's new Journal app has raised privacy concerns among Apple's userbase. Tech expert Kim Komando examines social media rumors and explains what steps to take to protect yourself.
Although Facebook has denied that our phones listen to us, they do have other ways of finding out what we are talking about, listening to and searching for.
With the integration of OpenAI technology, Figure 01 has taken a significant leap forward, showcasing the potential of robots to understand and interact with us on a personal level.
Port Ellen, newly reopened whisky distillery in Scotland, is using SmokeDNAi technology to understand mouth-feel and flavors during the whisky maturation process.
Telly, a smart TV firm, is promising to give out their 4K 55-inch TV for free. What must you give in return? The innovative, yet potentially unsettling, answer might shock you.
The moment a spam invite hits your calendar, it’s like an uninvited guest at a party. So, what do you do? Show it the door.
Identity thieves are now targeting children and are making large sums of money by exploiting children's identities, possibly hurting their financial future.
There's a clever way to change the notification sounds on your Android without having to look at your screen. Kurt "CyberGuy" Knutsson explains.
If your bank accounted has been hacked, there are a number of steps you can take to prevent it from happening again. Kurt "CyberGuy" Knutsson explains.
Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.
The Wave House, a data center in Heidelberg, Germany, is the the largest 3D-printed building in Europe. Its walls were built in about 140 hours.
Some government agencies around the world are struggling to meet their staffing goals when it comes to hiring artificial intelligence experts.
Google Maps' recent upgrades have introduced real-time ETA and turn-by-turn directions to your phone's lock screen while you are traveling.
Kat Cammack says AI could disrupt the 2024 election. A report says shared AI image tools generate election disinformation in 41% of cases and voting disinformation in 59% of cases.
Deepfakes have become commonplace, and the technology is only getting better, but there are certain elements that might give away the fact that an image is AI-generated.

Success - Overcoming Bodily Conditions Which Seem Impossible of Change

Conditions differ from circumstances. Circumstances are changeable conditions which merely... Read More

Self-confidence - How To Develop This Important Key to Success

"One important key to success is self-confidence. An important key... Read More

Balance: Flow and Faith

In so many areas of life we must always be... Read More

What Is Your Legacy of Success?

Success! Easy to talk about, but difficult to achieve. Or... Read More

Success - Its Never Too Late

Ray Kroc, the founder of McDonalds, was over fifty when... Read More

I Just Did It!

I succeeded. I achieved my goal. I am successful. I... Read More

Youve Got To Find Passion In It

People often ask me, "Josh, if you had one bit... Read More

Mastering The Habits Of Success

The difference between success and failure is based on behavior.... Read More

How to Make Your Wildest Dreams a Reality

According to Bill Gates there are 3 keys to success... Read More

Is Money Everything?

Money will buy me a house, but not a home,... Read More

A Gold Medal in Love

Five-time gold medal-winning figure skater, Jenny Kilmer, has won the... Read More

Success: 10 Tips to Make Failure Work for You

1)Failure is normal.Everyone has faced failure. Some people talk about... Read More

What is Failure Anyway?

Does it surprise you that only 400 cokes were sold... Read More

Do You Know Whats The #1 Success Secret Is?

How many people do you hear complaining about their job,... Read More

What Does Success Look Like To You?

So many of us want success, but how many of... Read More

Awaken to Something New in Your Life: Conscious Change

What do we want most from life? Certainly, we all... Read More

Psychological Tips For Effective Examination Techniques

One of the inevitabilities of University life is the examination.... Read More

The Best Time for Action? No Time Like the Present...

Too often we wait for the 'right time' or 'the... Read More

Job and Life Rules to Follow

Decide which game to play. Is winning that... Read More

Do You Really Think So?

It's not new news. It's not some ethereal theory. It's... Read More

Personal Excellence: Whats Your Motivation? (Part 3 of 3)

After 13 years of being married to the same woman... Read More

Self Improvement and Living in the Present Moment

Having clear goals and desires for our future, and planning... Read More

Looking for Harvey Weinstein - The Book and the Business

Two Immigrants Live The American DreamSome may call it a... Read More

The Secret Behind All Great Masterpieces: Lessons Learned!

The ten-year period which followed the stock market crash of... Read More

How To Become Rich and Famous

If you want to be rich and famous, you have... Read More

car service from Midway Alsip ..