We are repeatedly told that we should forget about unpleasant experiences (failures) and focus on pleasant ones (successes).
I agree totally with the last part of this proposition but only partly with the bit on forgetting about your unpleasant experiences.
Rather, I think unpleasant experiences must be confronted and "neutralized", otherwise they will always be lurking in your subconscious, ever ready to pounce upon you.
Don't delude yourself into thinking that they can simply and safely be swept under the carpet. Pull them right out and cut them down to size.
Clip their wings before they come back out to haunt you and poison your life.
These are ferocious little beasts that create pernicious feelings of guilt, anger, powerlessness leading straight to anxiety, depression and lowered self-esteem.
These are creatures of Darkness and nothing terrifies them as much as Light.
Pull them out and examine them in broad daylight and then you'll realize they are not as terrible as they seem.
In broad daylight, they melt away and become not just innocuous but even useful: they teach you lessons in what NOT to do.
And that is how you can learn from failure and turn negative experiences into positive, highly empowering lessons.
And "all's well that ends well"!
In the words of Dr. Jill Ammon-Wexler: "Every successful person throughout history has also faced and dealt with their own personal collection of fears and negative internal messages".
Anybody can do it!
Reserve some time to be by yourself or, better still, at night, before you fall off to sleep
1. Make a list of all your unpleasant experiences, all that you can remember, as far back as you can remember. Don't force yourself. Just take it easy
2. Carefully examine each one of those experiences and answer the following questions, as accurately as possible :
What happened exactly? Why? Where was it? When was it? How did it end? Why do you consider it as a negative experience? What might have been the consequences if it had ended otherwise (Envisage as many possible consequences as possible)? Don't you think things might have been worse if it had ended otherwise (Are you sure it wasn't a blessing in disguise, after all)?
3. After asking and answering all those questions, you'll find yourself relieved, as if a terrible weight had been lifted off your shoulders.
Your "negative experience" has now been reduced to its rightful size and rendered innocuous by being examined in the Light of Day. It will no longer come to haunt you.
4. From now on, you will do the same with even your most recent negative experiences and you'll soon feel that these will happen more and more rarely.
When you sit and examine your life, you'll see more and more success, less and less failure. You will carry out this exercise from time to time, maybe once a week.
5. Now get up and stand upright, Shake the dust of negative experiences off your clothes and move forward, fully aware that: You are the Maker and Owner of your Destiny.
So, why allow yourself to be ruled by your own creature and property?
Why keep worshipping a God you make with your own hands?
Focus on positive thoughts but also make sure you "neutralize" all negative thoughts!
A.M.Sall - author, coach, success mindset strategist
A 30+year experience - translator, teacher, traveler, musician, writer, plus crosscultural awareness, worldwide ancient spiritual traditions... Success Mindset Philosopher A.M.Sall helps you "be whatever you want to be and get whatever you want to get." http://www.health-beauty-wellness.com/negative.htm
ohare limo service Grand Rapids ..Think out of the box, they say. But what's a... Read More
In terms of life success, there are four pretty obvious... Read More
I confess, I love westerns. There is nothing like those... Read More
1. Differentiate yourself using a Personal Value Proposition. A PVP... Read More
One of the greatest compliments I ever received in my... Read More
What Makes the Difference?On a warm spring afternoon, fifteen years... Read More
Have you ever met people who exude charm and charisma?... Read More
Consider what it takes to become an undeniable success with... Read More
"Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence.... Read More
Often just one self-help principle can increase your power to... Read More
If we are involved in a project, how hard should... Read More
An odd but frequent barrier to prosperity is the belief... Read More
I was flying home from a seminar in Atlanta yesterday... Read More
The only thing in life we have direct control over... Read More
Failure is GreatYou are probably asking yourself what could be... Read More
I did it my way -Frank SinatraWhat is a successful... Read More
The gambling instinct is in every man or woman. All... Read More
(excerpted from The Challenge to Succeed audio series)It is a... Read More
On a raw, cold day in the European Alps, Lance... Read More
Well, it's that time of the year again. No, I... Read More
Energy and persistence conquer all things. - Benjamin FranklinThough Ben... Read More
You may not realise it yet but you may have... Read More
In 1989, when the Berlin Wall came down and the... Read More
Does your life feel less than fulfilling? Are you waiting... Read More
For each of us, how successful we feel will depend... Read More
executive chauffeured services Barrington Hills ..What if I told you that you could be more... Read More
Who wants to carry on being a failure?Failure. Not a... Read More
"Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence.... Read More
As a child you probably learned failing is bad...Failing meant... Read More
To achieve what you want, what you desire, needs a... Read More
Two weeks ago we took a look at the power... Read More
Our lives and the circumstances we live in are largely... Read More
"The mind grows by what it feeds on." J.... Read More
Believe it or not, there is a special 3-step formula... Read More
Whether you are self-employed, whether you are an employee, whether... Read More
Recently I stumbled across a list of Microsoft Interview questions... Read More
Just how powerful is the Subconscious Mind and how can... Read More
Don't expect results over night - what??If you were to... Read More
Self-esteem is very important. It is the way we view... Read More
What if?you could have it all? 6 Steps to Living... Read More
Affirmations are emotionally driven statements of intention and faith that... Read More
Recently, I have been riveted by the amazing reality show... Read More
I bet you want to be wealthy, but somehow the... Read More
We speak every day without fully recognizing the impact our... Read More
The very first "motivational speaker" I heard as an adult... Read More
On March 27th 2005, Oxford won the annual boat race... Read More
Hi, Jim Rohn here. This month we focus on accelerating... Read More
We have all read about people who are successful briefly.... Read More
Building wealth isn't something for the frightened, ignorant, and lost.... Read More
Hope you're having a GREAT Day!Last night I was reading... Read More
Success |