Here's a fun little experiment:
Take a few seconds and look around you, noticing and focusing on everything you see that is blue. Just look around and notice everything that is blue.
Now close your eyes, and tell me everything you noticed that is green.
Threw you a bit of a curve ball there, didn't I?
If you are like most folks, you were expecting me to ask you to name everything that was blue. Instead I asked for something different from which you had focused on.
Here's an interesting fact from the world of race car driving:
As I understand it, when new drivers are learning how to race, one of the first things they're taught is what to focus on when they go into a spin.
The natural tendency is for them to focus on the wall they're trying to avoid hitting - and they usually end up hitting the wall. They are taught instead not to focus on the wall, but on where they want to go. In this way, they have a better chance of avoiding the wall and successfully getting out of the spin.
The exercise and story both point to the incredible power of focus in our lives. Wherever we place our focus, the rest of our mind and emotions will follow.
So how do we learn how to do this focus stuff?
One of the quickest ways to begin to strengthen your focus muscles is to practice the 5-percent/95-percent rule. That means to focus no more than 5 percent on what you don't want and 95 percent on what you do want.
Focus 5 percent on what you fear and 95 percent on getting educated and skilled to face it.
Did you know that we all have fears? Even people who appear to fear nothing. The trick is not to have no fear but to work at becoming strong and skilled enough to face and conquer your fears.
Focus 5 percent on the problem and 95 percent on the healthiest solution.
Often it's easy to get caught in the endless definition and redefinition of a problem. "What's the problem?" is the wrong question. A better question is: "How many different solutions can we create?"
Focus 5 percent on the mistake and 95 percent on learning from it.
There's a wonderful story about a new employee of a large corporation who makes a $10,000 mistake in his first week on the job. Upon being called into the CEO's office at the end of the day, he tells his boss that he realizes he will be fired and that he is sorry for the mistake. To which the CEO replies, "Fire you? No way. I just spent $10,000 training you." I bet he became a valuable employee.
Focus 5 percent on who to blame and 95 percent on making sure to heal.
Getting stuck in blame sets you up to be lame. Focusing on healing allows you to move on with your life.
Focus 5 percent on the conflict and 95 percent on the win-win-win resolution.
Conflict, especially in families, does not always have to be a win-lose situation. In any conflict, each side has needs. The question is what kind of solution can be found that meets as many of each person's needs as possible.
Focus 5 percent on what you must do and 95 percent on enjoying the process of it.
"I have to," "I've got to," "I wish I didn't have to" are all phrases that focus on having to do things we don't want to do. Better words that shift your focus would be: "How can I get all this done and enjoy the process?"
Finally, and most important:
Focus 5 percent on reading this 95 percent on applying it.
When you drive, your car follows your nose.
When you live, your life follows your focus. Where's your focus
Visit secretsofgreatrelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.
ohare limo service Grand Rapids ..Amazing thing, overwhelm!You don't usually see it coming. It just... Read More
Most humans experience unexpected setbacks which can cause huge stress... Read More
1. The Law of EveryoneIt is not neccessarily wrong to... Read More
In the body, the stress response is mediated by the... Read More
One of the best ways to combat stress and depression... Read More
Stress ReliefStress is a big business in Western society. We... Read More
Breathing is the vital force of life. It is considered... Read More
Stress, America's #1 health problem, is a leading cause of... Read More
Workplace stress is on the rise and it's costing corporate... Read More
Governements and businesses have regularly highlighted the costs of stress... Read More
Do you have stress in your life?......I know you answered... Read More
Life would be so wonderful if it weren't for other... Read More
Q: We recently had someone come to our company to... Read More
CHICAGO - According to a recent article in the September... Read More
We all have it; we live with it daily: stress.... Read More
As small business owners, we often take on more than... Read More
Did you ever feel like your "get-up-and-go" got up and... Read More
Stress can affect virtually any part of the body and... Read More
Stress relief and managementRecognizing stress symptoms can be a positive... Read More
Do you attack problems and solve them or do you... Read More
Managing stress is not easy if you don't have the... Read More
Case #1- Elizabeth, a 40 year old homemaker was always... Read More
Most of us are trying to balance work, home, and... Read More
Have you ever considered sewing a handbag as an act... Read More
To be a safe and predictable person for those around... Read More
executive chauffeured services Barrington Hills ..Do you ever feel stressed? Is stress a regular component... Read More
Stress is often seen as being unhealthy, but for some... Read More
The Rule of BalanceThere is more to life than work.... Read More
Stress seems to have become a constant factor in today's... Read More
Too much driving, too much shopping, too much rushing around,... Read More
What good is Personal or Business Success...if your Health is... Read More
"When you breathe, you inspire. When you do not breathe,... Read More
Shit happens. I know this to be a fact, because... Read More
There are many kinds of daily grinds. In the U.S.... Read More
Imagine going through your whole life in the constant fear... Read More
Genuine enthusiasm...real feeling of accomplishment...sense of satisfaction and fun. Welcome... Read More
It's no secret that we women, by virtue of our... Read More
Are You Too Stressed?Is your stomach all tied up in... Read More
Conceptualizing stress: Stress often has a negative connotation. Failure, illnesses,... Read More
Tough leaders are usually seen as ogres. Their exacting demands... Read More
The National Center for health statistics reported that in 1997,... Read More
Every day we are faced with a situation where our... Read More
June is the month of the honey moon. Custom holds... Read More
All stress comes from believing a thought that argues with... Read More
WHAT THE RESEARCH SAYSExperts in the stress management field have... Read More
In these times when companies are constantly down-sizing and right-sizing... Read More
Panic.Heart racing. Palms sweating. Breathing rapid and shallow. Mouth dry.... Read More
This is the time for daydreaming about your annual vacation.... Read More
Stress affects different people in different ways, but affect them... Read More
"Adopting the right attitude can convert a negative stress into... Read More
Stress Management |